Trap of Self-esteem

twilight (photo by Yusran)

A tree that was dead, before it actually fell to the ground, their roots still clutching the ground. When we lose the symbols of social status, self-esteem to last buffer that we considered to still exist. Without self-esteem, only intelligence that differentiates us with other creatures. However, behind the glory, self-esteem can cause us to fall in the trap of false glory.

As we know, the existence of self-esteem will not be out of frame psychosocial transactions. Between self-image with social recognition. When self-image does not get social support, we only get a respect that is not sincere, preamble, or simply to avoid conflict. A more violent response will refer to us as a narcissistic, arrogant, or anti-social.

Then, if we ignore the self-esteem, are we guaranteed to get approval or a positive social response?. If “positive social response” refers to a socially acceptable, the answer is yes!. But if it means getting respect, the answer is not necessarily!.

Not much different from the individual character that is not free from the tendency to develop ego centric behavior, such as envy, jealousy, contempt, pride. In the plural the same behavior can also be done. When a person develops the behavior of low profile, will get a variety of responses. Can be regarded as an expression of humility, or as a sign of weakness (inferiority). With these assessments, the social environment may feel obliged to respect, or has the right to take him for granted.

There is no standard formulation of the right way to put self-esteem. Only by controlling the primitive instinct (Sigmund Freud called  “Id”), such as greed for wealth, conceited, snobby, thirsty for glory, as well as other primitive instincts, humans have a dynamic awareness that is useful for life. An awareness that recognizes the existence of our own advantages and strengths of others. At one affair, with little relief, a person willing to give help to others. And, without feeling insulted, sincerely willing to accept help, to other matters. Feel superior in many respects, but not possible, nor useful. Mapping the social status just keep us busy to ask, who is under and who is above. Over time, the question will poison the brains with the stupidity that is not appropriate.

Let the glory of finding his own way. No need to finesse, the strategy design for self-image, or the activities are not sincere whose only purpose is to collect social approval


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